


Oh Hey, I’m a Dumbass Too

by orphan_account



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: 2012 era type fic i guess, Angst, Avengers Tower, Getting Together, M/M, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:41:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27909925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It’s not like being shoved together in a tower is gonna help them get along.They aren’t going to braid each other’s hair, or watch movies together, or work out together. They were just fine on their own. What Fury even thinking, putting them in Stark Tower?Oh hey, Isn’t it time for movie nig-?Oh fuck, what haven they gotten themselves into? Well, at least that’s all they have to worry about. Who needs Stark anyways.Well, turns out the Avengers do.
Relationships: Bruce Banner & Tony Stark, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov, Natasha Romanov & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Kudos: 23





	1. Who needs friends? Not Natasha Romanov. (Well, not counting Clint.)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I wrote the first chapter a while back, so it isn’t as good as I hope. This is kinda unplanned, so ignore my bullshit science and gaping plotholes. Enjoy!

It’s something she realizes, Natasha thinks, that, weirdly, she didn’t notice earlier. She’d been around him at his most wasted and most disastrous, yet it had still slipped her radar.

Now, Natasha not noticing something this obvious about a person sooner rather than later would usually be a cause of concern, and she’d probably think she was drugged or otherwise incapacitated. It’s strange, though, but she can see why she didn’t realize this about Stark.

He was quiet. 

Very quiet, in fact. Quiet enough to at least impress her, or even for her to not notice, if not for her training. She’d seen him around the media, around Pepper, around Lieutenant Colonel Rhodes. He was loud, boisterous, and endlessly sarcastic. Around them, and especially around her and Steve, he was so quiet she could sometimes see Steve forget he was even there.

The Avengers were quickly corralled in the Stark’s tower after the Battle of New York since Fury thought it was smart to put a bunch of super-powered and, not to mention, fucked up people together in the same building. Turns out more people than Loki are trying to destroy the world, and Hydra and Dr. Doom seemed to appear just a few weeks after the Chitari attack.

At the very least, it was polite of them to wait a few weeks. Thor knows that she had some injuries. Not that she’d tell anyone. 

At very least, she was busy helping out the ‘team’. Turns out being wildly recognized didn’t exactly help the super-spy career. 

She pacified herself with the fact she was pretty useful, or at least as useful as a human could be on a team of super-powered sort-of humans. At least she got the chance to take advantage of Stark’s fancy tower and awkward generosity.

That’s another thing, Natasha mused, it was that Stark kept shoving things at them. She saw Steve get annoyed, but he disguised it as well as a mess of anger issues and depression could disguise anything. Steve didn’t seem to like being in debt of such a bad ‘representation’ of the future, and he couldn’t seem to stop being snippy and stubborn around the billionaire. Not for lack of trying, at least, but they seemed to always manage to hit each other where it hurt without trying.

A comment about Stark’s dad, a comment about the past. It seemed like they were trying to be nice, but it just didn’t pan out. Stark would say something rude, Steve would say something ruder. But that’s where things got odd. She expected Stark to say something rude back, but he just.. held himself back. He’d mumble something, runaway, and miss the forlorn look Steve sent to his back. A few days later, everyone would have more gear, and Steve would have the most. Steve would consider this a show of his ‘arrogance’ and get madder.

It was a bit sad, but it was not like she cared enough to intervene. She didn’t really care about anyone in this building but Clint and Pepper. Clint was her buddy, and she.. just liked Pepper. Something about the fiery personality of the women appealed to her, and they still met for lunch often.

It’s not like she didn’t want to care. She just hadn’t gotten around to getting to know any of them, and that was fine with her. She still thought that some of the stuff on that dossier she made of Stark was true, and if so, she wasn’t sure she was interested in getting to know him. Steve and Banner both seemed like a mess, but perhaps they’d become closer.

She wasn’t sure what Fury saw in putting them together here. At least Clint wasn’t getting death glares from the other agents. Other than that, she didn’t really like this place and or the people around her. 

Well, she’d see. Maybe this wouldn’t be too bad. Or not. She didn’t care.


	2. Friendship For The Soul (Not that she needs one, excuse you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s not like they planned to all be in the living room at once.
> 
> Well, who doesn’t want to watch some TV? Might as well do it together. Couldn’t hurt much, right?

Hm.

This wasn’t affection, Natasha thought to herself, she was letting these relationships grow out of necessity and usefulness. Natasha let out a tired sigh into Thor’s amazing smelling hair. She was halfway through braiding his blond hair into a intricate fishtail. 

Thor was gleefully watching a episode of My Little Pony. He had figured out the TV surprisingly fast, but she wasn’t going to assume a thousands of years old being was stupid. 

He was sitting up perfectly straight on the couch as e laughed at the boisterous Rainbow.. Fire? Natasha had been focusing on the braiding of his hair, which was still, wow, really soft. You’d think that his hair would be tougher from all the time on the battlefield.

Thor was energetic, she had learned. Very energetic and sweet. It was usually a difficult task to gain her favor, but the loud god had wormed his way into her heart practically instantly. 

It was time like this, Natasha sighed internally, that she really felt like the stereotype of the badass woman with the soft side on a team of men. She was very aware of how she seemed to be exactly the stereotype. Her looks and actions didn’t seem to help that assumption. At least most of her teammates seemed to scared to assume she had any more emotions than eerily calm.

She wasn’t hiding anything ‘soft’ on the inside, nope. She wasn’t hiding anything at all. This was her personality. Rough, manipulative, cold. That was her.

But unlike most of modern society, she knew that she, a person of the female gender, could be multifaceted and kind without being an absolute dumbass. 

Thor let out a contented sigh and then perked up. Natasha hands slipped from Thor's silky hair, and she growled at the disruption of her braiding. Thor, in a remarkably quieter voice, probably taking pity on the man who entered the room's ruffled apperence, remarked,

”Friend Stark! I had not noticed your presence! You are stealthy, as always!” Thor grinned at the messy engineer, who looked like he crawled out a car engine. Natasha noticed the bags under his eyes were darker than normal, a sure-fire sign he had been up all night, probably with Bruce. Bruce was the only Avenger he didn’t avoid at all costs.

”Stark.” Natasha spoke, watching him flinch. He was sitting on a stool near the coffee maker, slumped onto the counter. He was waiting for the coffee, Natasha observed, looking him up and down.

”Hey, Sparkles, Romanov..” Stark yawned, and put his head into his arms with a groan.

”Busy day?” Natasha inquired, face blank. Stark pulled his head up for a moment more, to gauge her reaction. He cleared his expression (remarkably well, Natasha observed) and responded plainly.

”You could say that. Updating Capsicle’s shield strap.” He nodded cooly at the super solider who had just wandered into the room.

Roger’s mouth twisted unpleasantly at the nick name, and Natasha idly wondered if they would argue again. Rogers just sighed, and sat down next to the happily ignorant Thor.

“Hey, Thor. Um.. What are you watching?” Roger looked confusedly at the screen, which held a Zebra in a bath with other ponies. Definitely not something you she grew up with, but the messages of the show were sweet and more interesting than she first thought.

Thor nodded sagely and patted Roger’s back. Rogers watched the screen with bemusement.

”Twilight and her loyal friends have learned a good lesson, indeed. They have judged the Zebra, a mythical and different creature from themselves, the stallions, and learnt to not judge a person who seems different on the outside. This show has many wise lessons!”

Rogers watched it, as the new episode started. By the time that they had reached halfway through it, the Captain was watching with rapt attention. Natasha hid a fond smile behind a completly inconspicuous hand, and chuckled softly at the sight.

"This.. This is great! Is this what people watch these days?" Rogers smiled, small and excited. Natasha was happy to finally see Rogers show some excitement for the future, even if it was for a kid’s show about magical talking ponies. Thor grinned back at him, excited to have someone to enjoy it with, and he continued to gleefully explain the show.

Clint walked in as they discussed their favorite characters. Natasha didn’t really think that ‘walking in’ consisted of dropping in from the ceiling vents, but Clint maintained that it was perfectly normal. 

“I think Apple Jack is my favorite. She seems like a nice gal- Er, pony.” St- Rogers said, as he tried to figure out how to go to the next episode. Thor chuckled loudly and took the remote from him and changed it. Steve, er, Rogers, blushed and cleared his throat awkwardly.

”Yes, Apple Jack is a very noble stallion. I believe the pegasus Rainbow Dash is my favorite. She is of great speed!”

Clint launched himself onto the couch. He looked up at the TV and then back at the two grown men watching with glee. He looked back at Natasha questioningly, who shrugged. She wasn’t exactly sure what the two men saw in this show, but far be it for her to judge them.

She heard a clatter from behind her, and she turned around from her solent conversation with Clint to see that Stark had finally passed out from exhaustion.

”I like Rainbow Dash too, big guy.” Clint smirked at Thor, who lit up with joy at the shared favorite.

”I definitely pegged you as someone who liked Apple Jack, Cap.” Clint poked Steve’s shoulder, who in turn awkwardly smiled at Clint, unsure if he was being insulted. Natasha elbowed him and Clint sighed.

They watched the rest of season 2, and were finishing the final episode when Bruce finally walked in.

“Hey.” He yawned, rubbing at his tired eyes, “What’s everyone watching?”

Bruce plopped down on the loveseat, looking half asleep where he sat. Natasha confirmed her earlier hypothesis of their two geniuses being up all night. 

Bruce looked relatively more put together and well rested than Tony, likely having slept in the last 72 hours- Unlike Tony, of course.

”This show about talking ponies. I think I watched, like, a few episodes a while back.” Clint answered. 

“It’s so interesting! The people in the town are so kind to each other. The animation.. it’s so incredible.” Rogers smiled, a tint to his cheek.

”Oh, I think I watched some of this. Both you and Rogers are similar to the ponies you like, actually.” Bruce mused out loud. Natasha had figured their favor of the ponies to be a unconscious choice on their part, and was surprised they had to be told their similarities. 

”Ah, yes! The noble Apple Jack is similar to you, Steven! I suppose the fierce Rainbow Dash is similar to me.” Thor nodded to himself, thinking about it with a look of intense introspection.

”You know who else is similar to one of the ponies on your show? Stark’s kind of like that purple one.. ah, Twinkle Sprinkle or something.” Natasha commented. The two were actually very similar in reactions and ideals. 

Thor looked scandalized at the mix up of whatever that purple pony’s name was, but Rogers, with a thoughtful expression, spoke up.

”He is actually a tad similar to Twilight. Huh. I guess I never realize how similar she and really Stark were.”

There was a crash from behind them, and a startled voice garbled out.

”What..? My name?” The raccoon eyed Stark looked up, and rubbed at his eyes sleepily.

It was times like this where she could see the shining of a decent person through Stark, someone who wasn’t like her file on him. Of course, it left as soon as it came. 

This time, as he blinked confusedly, she thought it might stick around for a bit. 

Steve looked startled at him, and looked back at Natasha. He paused the episode and raised an eyebrow.

“He was here the whole time? I thought he left. I guess I didn’t realize he could be that quiet.” He admitted sheepishly. He cleared his throat, and looked back at the slightly more awake inventor.

”Um, want to join us, Stark?” Steve offered, trying to bridge the awkward silence that had made the air thick with tension. Natasha looked back at Stark, who looked like he wanted to throw himself out of the nearest window.

”Oh, no, I have to go do a-“ Stark started, trying unsuccessfully to push himself off the counter, but a unimpressed Thor stood and went over to him. Thor slung a heavy arm around him and smiled at him, just a bit too wide.

”Nonsense! You surely have time to relax and bit, Son of Stark. Come join us for the enjoyment of these.. uh, cartons.”

”Cartoons, Thor. ..Um, right, Natasha?” Steve looked back at her, uncertain. Not waiting for her reply, Thor manhandled Stark over to the huge couch they were all slumped down on. Banner was asleep on the only other couch, so Stark was forced to squish into the farthest part of the couch from everyone.

“Okayyy.. Point Break, what’re we watchin’?” He yawned, rubbing at the stubble on his unusually messy goatee.

”The show of ponies!” Thor waved his hand excitedly at the paused screen.

“This kid’s show? Huh. Never pegged the Ice Queen to find this interesting.” Tony smirked at Natasha, and then looked at the screen for a moment before promptly slumping into the couch and waved a loose hand.

”Play away, I guess.”

Okay. Maybe he was asshole. But he was tolerable when sleepy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So from what I can tell, this chapter is much better than my first practice chapter I wrote a whole back. I had fun with this! 
> 
> So, I’m doing one chapter each with switching perspective. 
> 
> Next is Tony, than Steve. Maybe Banner? Probably not Thor or Clint, unless people want it. The reason Natasha has two chapters is because...
> 
> ✨I don’t know how to plan✨
> 
> Let me know if there are any typos! I have no idea where this is going, soo.. Let me know if you have any ideas?


End file.
